Saturday, 4 January 2014

Final Fantasy XIII – Part 6

After days of waiting he finally got it done, the sad story of this video is that it was also filmed back in October so again we are watching a months old video. The other sad part is that he said he was gonna get both videos done by the end of last year and he got one done but said that he was pushing it to get the video done but failed to do so. It gets worse as even though he pushed to get it done and failed he still had days of work to do so why didn't he tell us the truth because he knew he wouldn't get it done but hey he said sorry that he didn't get it done by new years so we can forgive him..... right.
Fuck No
It seems that spoony is using JWPlayer as his new video player and god is it awful, it works even worse than blip as the video kept crashing while I was watching. Anyway to the actual video, he starts the review right where he left off the last and immediately starts ranting after the anime wannabee intro. Spoony references why does god need a star ship from a shitty star trek movie and god was it awful.

He starts to attack the combat system and says that at least in FF10 you had to figure out a pattern to take out your enemy while in FF13 you don't...... umm wrong. It's not that obvious in FF13 as you only use the auto attack when you have info on the enemy because if you don't you'll need to figure our it's weakness through using a variety of attacks so your an idiot spoontard. He says that manually doing it is a waste of time even though I actually used it quite frequently as some moves increase the stagger more than what the auto chooses for you.
At the end boss spoony complains that the fight is too easy and you only need to use army of one in order to win, wrong again because spoony grinded in order to get army of one to that level of effectiveness. I have played the game and I barley used that move because it wasn't useful and multiple regular attacks did more damage compared to the time spent using that one single move.
Later on in the upgrading tree it must become stronger and that means you grind your way there which spoony must have did even though he skipped over the grinding of gran pulse which he didn't cover. We can tell this as his characters stats were higher than average during the final battle, the battle would have been tougher as it was for me because I played the game and enjoyed it rather than grinding and farming like no tomorrow. You shouldn't play games that way as you'll just force yourself the hate the game due to the hours and hours on end of grinding.
They beat the boss and suddenly most of the gang turn into monsters causing Fang to transform into Ragnarok which is what bartantedus wants but it turns out that this was an illusion meant to force her to destroy him and you can tell that from playing the game but no Spoony rants on this and says what the hell happened they were dead and says "friendship bullshit" even though at that point in the game and even in the footage he showed lighting says falcie smoke and mirrors which means that didn't happen. He is just trolling the game as he has been doing since day one and it's just pathetic, can't he just give us his actual opinion on a game truthfully rather than making up stupid reasons to hate it. 
Free monster porn
Barthandelus dies and cocoon starts to fall and before we see what happens spoony rants saying "thanks snow you just killed millions of people" and if he just waited a second he would see that fang and vanille transform into Ragnarok and save cocoon from falling. He also says duh how do they do that even though they have done it before in the past and you know that from playing the game because they fucking tell you..... god is this guy an idiot. He also never talked about the games narrative flashing back and forward between the past and present which is interesting in itself as we get to see who they were before and how these characters have developed over the course of the game. This is a core piece of the storytelling in this game and he never talked about it.

He ends the review up a horrible sketch where spoony gets the beating he deserves, snow enters his house and starts to beat the shit out of spoony while quoting the game but spoony fights back by ripping off road house. They reenact the scene from the game where snow hangs his jacket out and it gets shot to pieces although snow isn't covered in bandages but wearing a shirt probably because he didn't want people to see his man tits and beer gut and yes that is cinema snobs friend playing snow. That again backs up the time when this was filmed and that was probably around the same time as that justin bieber video they did together. After this fiasco we can hear a voice clip from Advent Children so I guess that's next, he's gonna troll it like a retard isn't he. I almost didn't recognize Brian since he has shaved his face since the last time I saw him, cinema snob also posted this video on his site since Brian appeared in it.
Spoony cut alot of this game out as there is a shit ton he never talked about even though he has reviewed this over a year so why didn't he, probably because he never played the game and just reviewed it off Sean Fausz's game play footage thinking that nobody has played the game and wouldn't object to what he says it is but guess what...... we did as myself and others have criticized him for it. It's just shows how big on an idiot and ignorant he is. 
Throughout the review he keeps picking at the data logs acting like the game should spell every little detail to you, here's an example in Mass Effect an asair says by the goddess and that's a reference to their culture and they don't tell you what it is because you guessed it datalog. FF13 isn't the only game that does this dumb ass so stop acting like this is your first encounter. Spoony also never showed or talked about vanilles flashback where she comes out of her crystal nude only covered by a very bright light, he should have mentioned this and talked about how the Japanese like em young because you know they're a bunch of fucking pedophiles.

Constructive criticism doesn't get any better than this, I have painstakingly fought back against his criticism of this game because I know what he is doing. He always says that he goes into something with an open mind not wanting to hate it but that's a lie because he always does. I hope you have enjoyed my fight back against this prick across all the posts about him because he seriously deserves it, I'll see you next time when this guys again does something stupid.

Video Link
Asshole hasn't uploaded to YouTube yet and probably won't due to copyright because he only cares about the money.

The cheap bastard actually did upload to YouTube the other day so yippee, now you can watch the video without it stuttering every two seconds.
I'll fix this up and add more pictures to this tomorrow as his new video player is messing up real badly but for now enjoy heaps of text.

In other News
Spoony one admits he is a gay faggot.
He actually got this review done days after he was supposed to.
The freak himself really needs his hentai, then he must have been the one searching FF13 porno's.


  1. My god this is beautiful. I have trolled the webs for many ages and never before this blog have I seen such a glorious display of Circle Jerking. You fine young gentlemen must have the wrists of champions.

    Btw you know the weenis is the little flap of skin at the end of your elbow right? Just wondering...

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  3. God in heaven, you actually made a blog all about the problems you have with an internet celebrity? This would be impressive, if it didn't seem like a massive waste of time. I beg you, friend, put out some original content and shelve this.

  4. "Spoony admits he is a gay faggot"

    Oh. Nice. Clever. Brilliant. All hail the mighty Pearse Hillock and his lowest common denominator logic of resorting to incredibly lame insults typically made by remedial 6-year-olds over the headset of a Call Of Duty game, after a whopping 9 seconds of forethought and a double digit IQ used to formulate it. Clearly, you are a clever, relevant, intelligent, mature, well-reasoned individual who is incredibly informed on the subjects of which he speaks upon.

    Except for the fact that in reality, you are none of those things.

    And before you go back to your indignant denial and deeply idiotic go-to pre-rehearsed reply that I know you like to retort with on here, such as "Yeah, but Spoony is worse..", let me remind you that i'm not talking about him right now, nor am I making this about him. I'm making it about you. I'm no fan of Spoony, by any means. I don't like him. I never did. But that's not the point. I'm attacking YOU right now, based on your logic (or lack thereof). The burden is on you right now to defend yourself, or risk looking like a complete fucking moron, at the moment. Or in other words, it's "put up or shut up time"

    So impress me. Impress all of us. Explain why you are not a gibberish idiot with the IQ of a 7-year old laughing at his own misplaced sense of pride and self-importance after using such incredibly stupid and lame, ineffectual, unoriginal, unintelligent insults like that and every stupid fucking thing you bring up. Right now. Come on.

    Because from where me, you, and literally everyone else sits right now, you are obviously a very stupid child. You obviously do not possess decent grammar skills, spelling, or wording which suggests very strongly that you lack any kind of logical thinking ability, credibility, or cleverness to back up any of the shit you specifically talk.

    I mean, come on. You have to be at least that self-aware to realize what kind of imbecile immediately resorts to the "he's a faggot, hurr hurr hurr hurr" style of commentary to make any kind of point, right? Because I refuse to admit that even a mentally deficient 7-year old such as yourself dosn't understand what it makes you sound like, when that's the best you can do. Right?

    Forget Spoony. Explain why YOU think you're any better. And do it without referencing or half-assedly strawman argumenting Spoony into this, for once. Because everytime you do that, you just look like a whiny hypocrite who can't think of a better reason as to what makes Pearse Hillock such a big fucking deal. I don't think you can. Scratch that, I KNOW you can't. But it will be hilarious to watch you try. Simply because, news flash.... No one is laughing with you. Everyone is laughing AT you. You are a troll, and not even a very decent one.

    These are just true facts, my friend. Nothing but true facts.

    1. P.S: I know that everything I just said hurts you like a freight train to the face. You can deny it, but I know i'll be able to hear you crying from here. I know that in whatever pea brain you possess, that everything I've said about you, your lack of reason, hurts, becuase it's the truth.

      You get called out about your lame insults, your bad grammar, your strawman logic, your blundering bullshit and your creppy obsession of Spoony that seriously borders on dangerously psychotic just by the pure fact that this blog exists and you seem to devote so much of your fucking time to furthering your whiny, lame vendetta against some other asshole on the internet that just so coincidentally wrecks your fragle butt to pieces on such a regular basis.

      You know that you lack a life, maturity, intellect and the social graces to make it anywhere in this world, and all the ways in which this makes you a failure in whatever "real life" you eck out for yourself, day by miserable day, whenever you're NOT writing on this intensely creepy blog that constantly reads more like you want to passive-agressively stalk and/or make out with Spoony more than you seem to dislike him.

      I'm no fan of Spoony. In fact, if I can be quite honest I also think he is quite an arrogant shithead whose personality sucks and his content has declined down the crapper immensely to the point of complete irrelevancy. But if you think that you're any better than him, you don't need me to tell you this, but think again. At least I don't obsess over and stalk him like a deranged pervert, the way you seem to. You need to face the fact that you're not ANY better. Actually, you're much worse, because for as irritating, controversial, lazy or as off-putting as Spoony can be as an internet personality, he's nowhere near as fucking stupid and pathetic as you make yourself look like.

    2. Oh no your comments have certainly taken a toll on my ego, what can I possibly do. Listen if you don't know this blog is written in an angry troll like style and yes I insult him every chance I get but the criticism is there if you can see through your own blind anger. I do the same with the Cinema Snob sucks blog and Brad knows that and we have actually talked from time to time and he understands that. He knows that it's written in a style and that it's not my actual views because it's an act and I hold no real hate or anger against either as I just have a few problems with them.

    3. Dude this is absolutely pathetic, you remind me of people who review taxi services; just kill yourself if your actually that bored.

    4. oh my gosh your sad, do you need to me to mail you money?? im really poor but hell i think you need the money for therapy or something more than i do.

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  5. I have to ask you a question you asked in this. Have you actually played this game. The line wasn't Fal'cie smoke and mirrors. It was could be smoke and mirrors meaning that Lightning herself had no fucking clue what happened and said maybe it was some kind of illusion but had no idea.

    Also you say Spoony didn't play the game and just used Sean Fausz's video yet bash him for apparently grinding to level Army of One when by your own logic it would have been Sean and thus Spoony couldn't be blamed. Can't have it both ways man. '

    Now how about answering some of the legitimate criticism. Why did they attack a random motorcycle race? Fang and Vanille came up with the plan to become Ragnarok and save Cocoon durning the fall while the rest of the party had no idea so they still went ahead with killing Orphan with no actual plan to save Cocoon. So... Yeah... Still a horribly stupid idea that worked out well because Fang and Vanille figured something out at the last minute.

    You may have some proper criticism but you ignore lots of proper criticism from Spoony too. If you want to criticize spoony go ahead but use some proper criticism not this whiny hateful bullshit.

    1. Yes I have played this game and it's sequel, even if the line wasn't that it was similar so no need to nitpick. It was smoke and mirrors meaning an illusion and you can tell that from playing the game.

      I don't literally mean he didn't play the game but he barley payed attention to anything and blundered at every point.

      They ended up in the race to cause dysfunction between the city to give them room to get to Barthandelus, you can tell that from playing the game and it made for a cool scene. They killed orphan because they had no other choice because if they didn't someone else would, who the hell knows how fang and vanille did it but they did. Who knows what powers they have that they didn't show us and that goes for the fal cie, I understand your hate but spoony is just trolling the game and we all know it.

    2. Well of course he is. That's kind of the point. The reviewers in the tgwtg circle which I still count spoony as part of are for the most part comedians not reviewers. It's his job to exaggerate and distort for the sake of comedy. There are legitimate criticisms but for the most part it's humour. I'm actually curious why you seem to have an almost personal hatred here?

    3. Well it's not like people want to hear a critical response to said media, we just want shits and giggles. That's how to go about reviewing, oh yea by the way did you even read stephanie's post below because if you did you would already know I hold no real hate.

  6. This is a reply to everyone: Guys, Pearse is a pretty good guy from what I have talked to him about. I'll admit, I lashed out at him too in his Cinema Snob blog, but then I realized 1. This is obviously him playing troll and fucking around and 2. Ranting at a guy for his rant blog kind of makes your whole freak out negated. It's just a blog, he's nowhere near the level I have seen some people go who ACTUALLY mean it, and really...*sigh* Kill yourself? I know you were not being serious - at least I hope not - but that is vicious. As someone with depression who was told by someone I should kill myself to do the world a stings. I hope I am making some sense, as I am less than 100 percent right now. All I am saying is, approach the issue with the blog differently and you'll see it for what it is. Trolling the trolls while voicing an opinion.Now, his "issue" with Jerrid Foiles, THAT may be real...Or just sexual tension ;)

    1. Yes you are correct and thank you for saying that, people tend to not understand how I go about my posts and just vent rage instead of talking about my criticism and spoonys faults.

    2. Any time, man. The aforementioned hate stream...well, you know how I get about that :) Dude, I like you and even if I didn't...people need to fucking chill.I happen to enjoy Spoony and Brad but I can take a joke...just like they can.

  7. "Spoony one admits he is a gay faggot." gee...

    1. I know right? Almost like this blog is tongue-in-cheek or something...