Wednesday, 13 August 2014

Big Trouble in Little China (Commodore 64) Review

Well it's almost been a month since his last video, and no, Wrestle Wrestle and the Nostalgia critic episode don't count since they require little effort. And what did he decide to "review", Big Trouble in Little China for the Commodore 64, seriously why does he even bother to do anything when he does video's on the most mundane stuff.

He starts out the video with a painful sketch like all TGWTG video's, seriously it's like watching amateur hour at your local comedy club, except this time it ain't funny. It features Insano and what appears to be Spoonys fluffer talking about what happened to Spoony, they mention a Mako (pronounced Ma-Ko and not may-ko, faggot wapanese fanboy) explosion and my eyes begin to role because you know video game reference. After that opening sequence Spoony begins to riff the opening of the movie the game is based on, he mostly says a load of crap thinking he sounds smart but he does say one thing of major importance. He says that Final Fantasy 13-2 is in the "render queue", I'm pretty sure that porn video of spoony getting ass raped by Space Marines from Warhammer 40k is also in that render queue.
April-chan is not amused
After that he starts talking about the movie and the lengths he went to get a working Commodore 64 from Germany, because Spoony loves his German scat, what didn't you know he loves it when his fans and April all take a dump on his chest, all at the same time! Anyway, I'm pretty sure that his Paetron money payed for all Commodore 64 crap he bought, that and April's hair dye. As usual it takes him seven and a half miniutes til he actually talks about the game, and boy is the rest of the video as painful as Spoony One's tantrums.
What the hell am I looking at?
He seriously goes through the game like he's the Angry Video Game Nerd, while randomly cutting to clips from the movie to keep you entertained, but even those can't save this video. It's like watching the early days of the Irate Gamer, except it's worse because remember this is the Spoony One, aka Noah "cumdumpster" Antwiler. He get's so desperate he resorts to playing the Gangnam style music to his low pan style, "insert angry comment here".
Yeah, I bet this is what fucks him at night
And after all that he ends the video parodying the end of the movie and a headless appears holding a highlander game, oh god, it better not be another Commodore 64 game because I don't want to watch another AVGN rip off video. But remember this is Spoony, so he's always gonna do something stupid, like threaten someone with rape, who said that?

Better yet, shove that rope up his ass
Spoony can read alright, but he needs giant font because he's bipolar
Don't we all just love that anime troll
That's all I got......for now!

5 comments:

  1. It's so good to see you back in action, Pearse. I've truly missed your rants. What's with the extremely long hiatus?

    P.S. Brad has unbanned me on his site, even though I didn't even ask him for it, lol. He probably realized his mistake.

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  2. you still need to adress this asshole getting monthly donations from retards for doing nothing...
    And yeah this "review" was a horrible avgn ripoff. fuck spoony, fuck him up his stupid ass

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    1. Yeah I've seen his Patreon account and it's just sad to see all those ass hats giving him money while he sits on his ass and puts even less effort into his videos now. It's even more sad since his money has went up about 50 dollars in two weeks. I'll probably do a post about it later.

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    2. First time I saw it I lost ALL hope in humanity, how can you donate to someone who fucking laughs at his fans and insults them and then doesnt do any decent work for months? Im baffled...

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    3. I know how you feel, I too couldn't believe people are actually giving him money, it's insane!

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