Spoony: The Motion Picture?

Spoony counting how many different fluffer jobs he has.

I can't believe this, he reached the movie goal. Not only are the guys over at Paetron idiots, they are fucking retarded to be giving some ADHD spastic 5K a fucking month. But enough of that he was a movie to make which will probably come out sometime in the Year 40K where Spoony will be a God encased in Gold worshiped by all. Wait that's War hammer 40K, anyway never mind he's just gonna use this to push back his video's even more. Pathetic...


Apparently he has a lot of footage but hasn't had time to edit it, he's lying out of his ass as usual because he's a coward and he can't face the truth that he's a lazy bastard. He wants to do more counter monkey's and wrestling video's even though it's only him in front of a camera, that literally takes no effort. He say's he been looking for an editor to edit his footage for him and that's what is keeping him back but he has other priorities which basically mean's he's jacking off to Chinese cartoon's all day. That or being pummeled by two 10 foot black guys with 2 meter wieners, we all know it's true that his real job is a fluffer.

He's going through this entire thing like he's holding himself together with medication, what other reason is there for him being so calm in his recent video's. He said "April say's he's a control freak when it comes to editing", but we all know he's a control freak all the time. Card's against Humanity, I can't believe he brought this up, he say's he's recorded hours of footage but he needs to cut it down to a watchable length. He doesn't have a job so what the hell is he doing all day, being strangled in the shower by April?

He said he's gonna have a video up by Halloween but only time will tell if he actually does it, but we all know the end result will be this:

Anyway, let's get away from that bizarre creation and take a gander at the comments section on his website instead of YouTube because he banned comments on this video on YouTube.

Can you believe in this?

Yeah, like we'll ever since the movie in our lifetime.

But don't you remember? It's in the render queue.

And I put more effort into this post than Spoony has on any of his video's this year, and I'm not even being payed for it. This guy is as trustworthy as a Japanese Otaku, but will shit all over you but only one will not steal your change.

Do Not Game - Dig the Black Hole all the way to the Tonight Show

I think he's finally gone off the deep end, if you think one person being unfunny is just sad, two is just as bad. He wants to be on the Tonight Show, I mean really...does he actually think he has a shot of getting on there? If so, should we root him on to see if he actually does get on TV so the entire world can see how big of an asshole he is? I say yes because what's the harm in trying, that and I want to see how he get's owned by a terrible professional comedian. Let's get this done guys, spread the links and the spice must flow!

He's got a good point

Captain Obvious

It's weird seeing that most of the comments are pro Spoony getting on the tonight show

Ewww, gross dude, you've got some problems

Well I wonder if they'll even consider him, but in the meantime he better be working on his next video instead of thinking about stuff that will never happen.

Black Hole of Board Games - Viewer's Choice 2

Wow, I didn't expect this, he put out a genuinely funny video. I'll keep this short since I actually liked the video, so let's begin. The video is basically him showing clips from vcr games that he wants to review, but he needs our help to decide which one he should do. Though everybody is screaming for Rap Rat so hopefully that's what he'll do, the poll ends at the end of this month so he better not be sitting on his ass and not working on the video in the meantime. And since none of the comments are constructive criticism there won't be any in this post. Though I've got to wonder, is he like this now because he understands that the only thing keeping him going is the Paetron fund?

Wrestle! Wrestle! Night of Champions 2014 - Part 1

Spoony staring off screen to his fluffer

Spoony ranted for a long time so to save you reading blocks of text I'll summarize it and put it into bullet points. But just remember to "beware the humidity".

What did we learn:

• Spoony has good Internet
• Canada has bad Internet
• It was a bad pay per view
• You paid 55 dollars for this shit
• Buy the WWE Network
• Spoony has problems with John Cena
• John Cena has rejuvenate properties 
• John Cena is hatched from cloning Tanks (Just liked Solid Snake)
• Get Eva Marie out of the ring (It's on the network)
• It's only 9.99
• Spoony thinks that he knows how to run the WWE
• Spoony was considering buying an album
• He said Gusto, who the hell even uses that word (besides anime characters)
• April apparently watches Wrestling with Noah
• Spoony saw the Miz and Dolph Ziggler's ass crack

Now wasn't that easy to read, well now you can go through the YouTube comments so you can torture yourself some more. That's if you survived watching the entire video, it's like a drinking game except it physically hurts. And I wonder what's on that page he's holding, it's not his grocery list but it could be a list of expenditures for his living expenses. Which is probably written down as "these idiots actually pay me almost 5 grand a month". Verdict: Use the video for background noise.

Black Hole of Board Games – Power Slam VCR Wrestling

Wait, what, Spoony One released a new video! Oh wait it's a shitty black hole of board games video and it's about a wrestling one, oh joy. It's time again for another rambling shit storm that he calls a video, and out of all the board games he could have chosen he picked a subject he has already covered, why couldn't he have chosen the Star Trek or the Wayne's World VCR game. They are much better material to work with and probably would have been funny video's if he chose them but no he had to go for the mundane and idiotic.

April-chan is not amused.

He starts off the video in his own little world where his script becomes reality, in layman's terms, amateur hour. Oh and April appears because she's a part of the "show" now, that and it gives the fan boys another thing to fap over besides Spoony. After the opening part he then plays the intro with updated clips which is more entertaining than this entire video, it takes him a minute and a half to actually start talking about the game. The rest of the video is him explaining how the game works and making rather shitty jokes, this video may not be the best but it's far better than those stupid counter monkey videos. And for some reason he's now watermarking his video's with his website link for some reason, probably trying to avoid copyright strikes or something like that. He does get hung up on the pronunciation of suplex which the announcer was saying as su-play because old people are stupid like that, boy does he like to rant because that's what he thinks his fanbase wants.

Though there is one thing that he does right and that's the appearance of the Wyatt family from wrestling fame, this is the kind of stuff he should be doing and not messing the fanbase around. I mean what's wrong with a medieval knight holding him hostage to make him do a counter monkey, you know tying in the very thing you are reviewing into your video. Anyway time for some glorious YouTube comments:

That's probably because she is.

You see I'm not the only one who wants him to do a video on the Star Trek tape.

Exactly

I know, the lazy bastard!

I wonder what the hell he's gonna review next, it better not be another wrestling vcr game because he's taking forever making a video for Final Fantasy 13-2.

Counter Monkey – D&D 5th Edition Review (Part 1)

What an idiot, does he even know what he's talking about because he's coming off like a dumbass as usual. Just to make this clear, he hasn't even played the 5th Edition, he's judging it based on the pictures in the book. Even if he is giving it criticism he should label the video as a "first impression" since he's not even played it yet, that would be like someone "reviewing" Call of Duty without even playing it, I'm looking at you Pat the Nes Punk. Back to Spoony, he is a total retard when he talks about this since he's complaining like a child, his main gripe throughout this entire video is that the pictures don't look the same since they're drawn by different people. He act's like the art should be the same even though it's drawn by different people so why the hell would the pictures have the same art style. He gives this explanation in the video, and yet he still complains.

God damn, cut that hair you molester

He says that he's trying to spend "your" money properly, because he wants to create a background for his counter monkey video's, he wants to buy a castle backdrop which will cost over 1000 dollars. Even though that's probably bullshit since he's just pocketing the money to pay his bills, what a pathetic piece of shit. He also act's like he's some grizzled veteran with 50 years experience, talking about the "old days", he's just act's like that because being retro is niche and a hipster. Don't even watch the video, as usual his opinion holds no weight.

What you didn't know about Spoony

Ewww, Spoony chugged some of Linkara's magical elixir

Welcome one and all to the internet freak show that is the Spoony One aka Noah Antwiler. Here you will find some facts that you may or may not know about him, so bring on the monkeys.

• He is / may be a Jew due to the fact he has a large nose
• He started Patreon to pay for his Animu girlfriends hair dye
• During a game of truth or dare he was dared to blow Linkara, suffice to say he lost.
• He got his brother to point his police issued gun at a fan at his old house
• Nostalgia Critic was considering to let Spoony back on TGWTG because he thought he would commit suicide like Jew Wario
• Spoony's ex screwed a bunch of fans at a convention 
• Has Type 2 Bi-polar takes medicine to cope
• April was rumored to be fucking a black dude
• Was nearly sent to rehab after overdosing on medication
• Was nearly murdered in 2004 due to gambling debts
• Is a poser
• Doesn't know shit about video games
• He is not funny
• Killed a friend by making him eat pizza that was behind a toilet for 3 months, yes this actually happened and he admitted it during a counter monkey

Now you sort out the facts between the fiction, have fun.